It's one of those days in writer world. Frustrating. I am not patient when it comes to establishing a new career as a writer and a speaker. I want to be perfect at it. And I am not.
Of course I wasn't perfect in my last career as a teacher either, but I had been doing it for so long and with enough identifiable successes I felt more secure that I was being successful and offering something to the world. I remember being upset when I was unable to help a student whose home life offered numerous challenges. Someone said to me, "You can't save them all." And as much as it killed me to admit, they were right. I couldn't. But I could and did try to do the little I could. I didn't change their worlds overall, but I was able to help them a little.
I am not that point of confidence as a writer and speaker. This world is still a difficult place for me to feel as if I am making measurable headway. Some days I feel like I am floating, untethered and woefully unsure that I will ever offer a contribution worthy of anyone's time or up to the quality of what I want to do. Overwhelmed, isn't just a word around here. Yes, I know doubt is something all writers share, as do people in general, but it isn't fun.
Today I ran across a short article about approaching life. Basically the message was nice way to say, "Eat an elephant one bite at a time." I have heard this before. But I needed the reminder. This version was, "Don't set out to change the world, just do the next best thing. Every day." It's good advice.
I am off to put a boot in doubt's face, and do my next best thing.
Article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robin-obryant/acts-of-kindness
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
The Roller Coaster of Writing
Just a brief check in blog world. Been busy doing edits and more edits on my YA Contemporary Thriller Mirror Images. Really busy.
Right now my manuscript is out to some readers. It is the first time I have really let loose of it to let people who know me only somewhat see what I have been doing. I know my book is FAR from perfect and I know it will return with numerous edits for me to do, but I got my courage up to get on the ride.
Near where I grew up is a theme park that used to have a great roller coaster. It was a simple by today's standards. Just ups and downs and a few unexpected turns and drops. And I loved it. I don't dislike the newer, faster upside down roll over kinds with bigger drops. I like them. But I miss the fun of that good old dependable ride.
This is how I approached Mirror Images. When I started writing it, so long ago I don't want to admit it, the market was flooded with paranormals, dystopians, and of course, vampires. There was nothing wrong with that, I read and enjoyed them too. But it wasn't what I wanted to do.
I realized I missed the old mysteries and thrillers of my youth. I loved how empowered I felt when I followed the clues and figured out who the bad guy or killer was in my Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys novels. I had loved and still recommended to students all the teen thriller books of Lois Duncan who wrote I Know What You Did Last Summer and other books that now seem cheesy, but I loved them. I also liked that the books were short and even somewhat predictable, because having a "friendship" with the books was enjoyable. I read other types of books growing up and I learned, bettered my mind, challenged my ideas, and cried too over them. It was like with people in my life, who had done of all of these things too. I enjoyed all of the experiences, but when it came to picking my friends in books, I didn't want to learn or be challenged or always be involved in some drama. Those mysteries and thrillers were my friends I could depend on bringing me joy.
So I really gave some time to determining what had made those books appeal to me to the point I remembered them after all of the books I have read in my lifetime, and I have read a lot of books in my forty-eight years. I thought when I started at the beginning of Mirror Images and I still think there is still a place for these books in the lives of young readers living in this current world. Anything that can show young people that using your mind to overcome obstacles is the most important message I think a book can give beyond modeling the way to love and show kindness.
I looked at what I loved, books with suspense; who I loved, the thousands of resilient wonder young people I had worked with in my years as a teacher; and I thought this is what I can do; help others enjoy a book about teens who face obstacles and use their brains to figure out what to do. That's real life over and over.
On the surface my book is about a serial killer in a small town. But I think it's a book about growing up, loving and hating your family, falling in love, working your first job, being with friends, using your mind, making really hard choices, and learning to believe in yourself and others when everything and everyone says something different.
Right now I am enjoying my ride in the writing world. Some days I go up higher than I have been before and others drop quickly down much lower than I ever wanted to be. Sometimes it is the same day and I repeat my ups and downs.
Like a real roller coaster, the twists and turns and climbs and drops will surprise me. I am often a little afraid of where I will go next. But this is the ride I bought the ticket for and I am gladly on it now.
In real life as a writer, I need my hands to type, but in my mind I choose to stop holding on tight the safety bar. I am throwing my arms straight up to the sky and laughing and screaming with joy for the whole ride.
Right now my manuscript is out to some readers. It is the first time I have really let loose of it to let people who know me only somewhat see what I have been doing. I know my book is FAR from perfect and I know it will return with numerous edits for me to do, but I got my courage up to get on the ride.
Near where I grew up is a theme park that used to have a great roller coaster. It was a simple by today's standards. Just ups and downs and a few unexpected turns and drops. And I loved it. I don't dislike the newer, faster upside down roll over kinds with bigger drops. I like them. But I miss the fun of that good old dependable ride.
This is how I approached Mirror Images. When I started writing it, so long ago I don't want to admit it, the market was flooded with paranormals, dystopians, and of course, vampires. There was nothing wrong with that, I read and enjoyed them too. But it wasn't what I wanted to do.
I realized I missed the old mysteries and thrillers of my youth. I loved how empowered I felt when I followed the clues and figured out who the bad guy or killer was in my Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys novels. I had loved and still recommended to students all the teen thriller books of Lois Duncan who wrote I Know What You Did Last Summer and other books that now seem cheesy, but I loved them. I also liked that the books were short and even somewhat predictable, because having a "friendship" with the books was enjoyable. I read other types of books growing up and I learned, bettered my mind, challenged my ideas, and cried too over them. It was like with people in my life, who had done of all of these things too. I enjoyed all of the experiences, but when it came to picking my friends in books, I didn't want to learn or be challenged or always be involved in some drama. Those mysteries and thrillers were my friends I could depend on bringing me joy.
So I really gave some time to determining what had made those books appeal to me to the point I remembered them after all of the books I have read in my lifetime, and I have read a lot of books in my forty-eight years. I thought when I started at the beginning of Mirror Images and I still think there is still a place for these books in the lives of young readers living in this current world. Anything that can show young people that using your mind to overcome obstacles is the most important message I think a book can give beyond modeling the way to love and show kindness.
I looked at what I loved, books with suspense; who I loved, the thousands of resilient wonder young people I had worked with in my years as a teacher; and I thought this is what I can do; help others enjoy a book about teens who face obstacles and use their brains to figure out what to do. That's real life over and over.
On the surface my book is about a serial killer in a small town. But I think it's a book about growing up, loving and hating your family, falling in love, working your first job, being with friends, using your mind, making really hard choices, and learning to believe in yourself and others when everything and everyone says something different.
Right now I am enjoying my ride in the writing world. Some days I go up higher than I have been before and others drop quickly down much lower than I ever wanted to be. Sometimes it is the same day and I repeat my ups and downs.
Like a real roller coaster, the twists and turns and climbs and drops will surprise me. I am often a little afraid of where I will go next. But this is the ride I bought the ticket for and I am gladly on it now.
In real life as a writer, I need my hands to type, but in my mind I choose to stop holding on tight the safety bar. I am throwing my arms straight up to the sky and laughing and screaming with joy for the whole ride.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Just a quick Howdy Doo!
It's just a quick Howdy Doo from the G. Aliceson Edwards writing world on how I am doing with my 2013 professional goals. It's already the fourth after all. It's kind of repeat of my last blog post, but it reminds me what I want to accomplish.
New Year has rolled in with me hurrying to finish the "final" draft of Mirror Images before I force myself to stop editing and give this book out to some beta readers. Yeah, I have been working on this book forever. (I did write others while I was working on this one. ) But I am determined to finally achieve the level of quality I want for this book. This day has been a long time coming, because I suffer, as many writers do, from insecurity that my writing shouldn't be read until it is perfect. Silly, since I taught for the years about the value of drafts and feedback. Physician heal thyself and all that.
After Betas return comments, then I will choose what to change or possibly what to keep the same in my quest for improvement.
Then I contact more agents and editors in a query frenzy. Yes, I really am going to push toward the publication goal. Doubt be danged! (I try not to cuss on social media.)
During some of the action above I will be designing my website. I blog, tweet, and Facebook, but have never gotten to the website phase. It is here.
I spent December giving away free presentations to schools and groups. Now I have more scheduled and some decent paying gigs too.
This is my January 2013. I hope you have great plans for your own.
I do a lot of dancing during my writing breaks. Check out this cool Facebook account and find the Hokey Pokey Shakespeare style.
New Year has rolled in with me hurrying to finish the "final" draft of Mirror Images before I force myself to stop editing and give this book out to some beta readers. Yeah, I have been working on this book forever. (I did write others while I was working on this one. ) But I am determined to finally achieve the level of quality I want for this book. This day has been a long time coming, because I suffer, as many writers do, from insecurity that my writing shouldn't be read until it is perfect. Silly, since I taught for the years about the value of drafts and feedback. Physician heal thyself and all that.
After Betas return comments, then I will choose what to change or possibly what to keep the same in my quest for improvement.
Then I contact more agents and editors in a query frenzy. Yes, I really am going to push toward the publication goal. Doubt be danged! (I try not to cuss on social media.)
During some of the action above I will be designing my website. I blog, tweet, and Facebook, but have never gotten to the website phase. It is here.
I spent December giving away free presentations to schools and groups. Now I have more scheduled and some decent paying gigs too.
This is my January 2013. I hope you have great plans for your own.
I do a lot of dancing during my writing breaks. Check out this cool Facebook account and find the Hokey Pokey Shakespeare style.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
It's 2013, Baby!
It's an extremely cold and icy day to begin the 2013 year, but I am totally looking forward to this day and the ones beyond.
My husband and I just discussed some of our joint goals of what we would like to see accomplished as far as our housing plans, finances, health, and travel. It helps us to know what we are shooting for!
Writing wise...I have already determined my January goals week by week.
They are:
Finish the edit on Mirror Images.
Strengthen my writing contacts with a road trip to critique and write-in.
Send M.I. out to beta readers.
Attend meetings and critiques.
Develop Website while waiting for beta reader responses.
Develop list of agents and editors to query.
Edit in Beta suggestions or ignore.
Send in queries and already requested FULLS.
Then make a new set of goals for February.
Now I need to work on accomplishing my first goal. Later!
My husband and I just discussed some of our joint goals of what we would like to see accomplished as far as our housing plans, finances, health, and travel. It helps us to know what we are shooting for!
Writing wise...I have already determined my January goals week by week.
They are:
Finish the edit on Mirror Images.
Strengthen my writing contacts with a road trip to critique and write-in.
Send M.I. out to beta readers.
Attend meetings and critiques.
Develop Website while waiting for beta reader responses.
Develop list of agents and editors to query.
Edit in Beta suggestions or ignore.
Send in queries and already requested FULLS.
Then make a new set of goals for February.
Now I need to work on accomplishing my first goal. Later!
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