Almost, but not quite

This post is out of order.  Should be for Nov. 29, 2011.
So I have finished my novel but not my Nanowrimo word count. I have until tomorrow at 11:59. I have been cheating a little at Nanowrimo anyways. I think all 50,000 are supposed to be from my novel. But they aren’t. (My HeRA wordcount is from my novel.) There are two reasons why not all of my words for Nanowrimo aren’t just the novel. One: My Nanowrimo work is a rough draft and I have discovered that probably due to my history of writing, performing, and directing plays, that my first drafts look more like screenplays. (Maybe I need enter the Script Writing Frenzy in the Spring too…Nope trying to do that and keep up with school activities in the Spring would do me in!) Second: I have found a do a LOT of writing that isn’t part of my novel in a month. This probably explains why I have so much trouble writing a novel in the first place, but I decided maybe it was worth including in my Nano count, so I have. This year I included an original Readers Theater I wrote about Veterans and my students performed for them. I also included some of my blog entries too. I haven’t included the ones I wrote for our family blog and I haven’t included emails either. I could have reached 50,000 words a whole lot faster if I included emails for sure. And even faster if I counted my Facebook and Twitter words.
One thing that put me behind for Nano was I got sick with a bad cold in the middle. Of course it had to be right when my students were practicing the Readers Theater, but it meant that after I dragged myself home to and from work, I was simply too exhausted to write…or breath much either. And then I found myself desperately behind and I really wanted to give up. Again.
Giving up is something I have found myself doing a lot as a writer. It is ironic that all my life I have been told I have talent as a writer and the task of becoming a writer is taking years. Years. In all the time I have been truly trying to become a writer I have only written what I would call two completed novels and I finished one of those today. Neither is edited and polished enough to send out yet. That is my next goal, mind you. But I very nearly gave up on the novel I finished today. I wanted to. I wanted to let myself accept that I was going to fail to meet another deadline I had set for myself in my writing career.
Now my time trying to become a writer hasn’t been all wasted. I joined a great writing group. I learned to talk the talk even if I wasn’t always walking the walk. I’ve met many of my literary heroes. I have learned a lot about writing. And I have managed to teach some people about writing to.
And I have written. I started a fabulous murder mystery and if I ever get it done I know exactly what I want the cover to look like. I even know what my celebratory tattoo will look like when I make the New York Time’s BestSeller List. Please note, as yet I have no tattoos, but if I ever did make that list I would have tattoos. And I have such a large canvas I could put some great tattoos on it. Although, if I become well known enough to be on such lists, I will have enough money to drastically reduce this canvas…Hmmm. Oh, and then I wrote my first book. And I really like it. I think it might even sell if I can commit to making a final product. And I wrote some other things too over the years…Some programs for school, some obituaries, some funeral poems, and some decent year end Christmas letters too.
I also took on some leadership roles for my writing group and judged a number of contests.
But I haven’t taken the time I need to do what I do best. Create and revise and refine.
Other people come to me for help with all of these things and I do it for them. But I don’t do them for me.
And I need to. So I am. I started the day earlier this month when I decided that come hell or high water or family or school or sickness I was going to finish my 50000 words in 30 days.
47, 525…Onward.
Nanowrimo has made some things suffer around here. The good news for me at school is that I am caught up. I have my grades current and I know the next couple of week’s lesson plans. I even have a pretty good idea of what’s coming up on both the school and home calendars for December and I am looking forward to the events.
But I am making myself a list of all of the things I need to take care of soon.
First of all I am going to talk to my husband instead of saying however sweetly… I have to write. I don’t have time to talk to you right now.
Then I will complete the following in a random order.
Stop wearing my headphones everywhere I go including when I am alone in the house. I usually don’t have them on anyways. I just wear them to make people think I am not listening.
I’m going to watch the five Ellen shows I have DVR’ed and the Chopped Superstars Show from Sunday. I am not certain that is even the correct name, but I don’t have time to find the remote to check.
I am going to stop carrying all of our phones around with me when I move locations or computers. I haven’t wanted to take the time to get up.
I might actually cook something that isn’t microwaved or a Thanksgiving leftover.
I will visit the grocery store and purchase food to be eaten in our home.
I will buy the cat some cat food. We just ran out today and it will get ugly oh so very quickly.
I will purchase the Little Debbies I provide to my advisory students.
I am going to put air in the front tire of my van. I could have done it at anytime if I just turned on the compressor in the garage.
I am going to try to actually listen more to the grandchildren when they make their short visits. Sometimes grandma is thinking about people kissing or going to high school and only pretending to watch Kick Buttowski.
I am going to go outside and remove the pumpkins and gourds that make up our festive decorations.
I am going to wash my huge red sweatshirt material robe again. It’s been seeing a lot of action this past month.
I am going to figure out a way to get better insulation in my office. See clothing choice above.
I am going to take an inventory of what food is left in the cabinet and refrigerator. I may even check the expiration dates. I know some has to have been purchased in October!
I am going to discuss the Christmas wish list with husband, mother, children, and grandchildren. The cat gets nothing. He has been a little naughty.
I will pick up the new Janet Evanovich book that has been setting untouched on living room table for two whole days now.
I am going to put away the thirty scarves I have worn this past month for my own Nanoscarfowrimo. It began because of my belief that many people who think they are writers wear scarves. I wore one scarf a day in November to remind people to be writers. I wore a different one every day and took photos of the day’s scarf. Check out previous blog posts. I even wore them when I wore my pajamas all day because I was sick.
It became a thing with my students to see which scarf I would wear next. One student even strongly voiced which of my scarves she would like if I was to suddenly pass away to that big school in the sky. My students started wearing scarves too.
And I am going to celebrate my success with introducing the school-wide Youth Nanowrimo Program. All of my 100 plus eighth graders participated. And Monday through Thursday of all of the weeks but one sixth, seventh, and eighth graders came to write. Some wrote just a few hundred and some wrote around 15, 000 but they came of their own free will and wrote. And wrote some more. Maybe it didn’t hurt that there were snacks and prizes, but there most definitely writing too. I haven’t seen all of their work yet, but what I have seen shows me that their writings are just as unique as they are. And I am proud of them.
And I will rejoice that I stuck with it this time. That I didn’t just give up. That I can wear the shirt I ordered online announcing I am a Nanowrimo winner with PRIDE. Because I earned it the hard way. Good BIC club all the way.
For those who maybe confused that “BIC” is something elicit and dirty. It means “Butt in Chair” as in real writers are good because they put their butts in their chairs and they do the work.
May you find your own BIC moments in your life and keep multiplying them until you get it right. Trust me, you’ll know when it happens!